While we were researching the 66-year marriage of Evelyn and Oral Roberts, one quote said a lot about their long term marriage.

Evelyn: "There are two things he [Oral] can do and one of them is preach. And the other one is he knows how to love me. Thank the Lord he does because there are very few other things he knows how to do."
Source: David Edwin Harrell, Jr. Oral Roberts: an American Life. 1985. pg. 351.

Oral also mentioned things that Evelyn did that gives the impression that she knew how to love him, too. It appears that the couple had a sense of humor too.

Knowing how to love one another is so very vital in a marriage. Do you know how to love your spouse?

Some couples place a very high value on unconditional love in their marriage. Are they being realistic?

Don't we all have a line that can't be crossed, something that we would consider a deal breaker in our marriage? For some, it may be physical abuse, for others it could be something like child porn or infidelity.

What about you? Do you believe in unconditional love in your marriage, no matter what? Is this something you and your spouse have talked about?

Tiger Woods announced today he is taking an "indefinite break" to help save his marriage with Elin Nordegren.

Give me a break.

Really now. Do average people who cheated on their spouses have the luxury of taking an indefinite break from work to focus on "being a better husband, father, and person" and to give more attention to their marriage?

Actually, do cheaters even need to be with their spouses 24/7 for an indefinite period of time to save their marriages? Do their spouses want them around 24/7 during the healing process? Probably not. There's a lot to be said for having some time alone now and then.

We hope he is sincere about doing what he has to do to save his marriage after the affairs, but if Tiger can't work on his marriage while fulfilling his other obligations, what does that say? Just considering the economic impact on the golf industry of his hiding away for awhile, isn't Tiger Woods' decision to take this break from golf just another sign of his selfishness?

As we read articles on the Internet, some touch our hearts, some tick us off, some fascinate us, some give interesting information, some provide meaningful quotations, some affirm what we believe, some challenge us, and some teach us something new. One of these articles ticked us off. Can you guess which one? Read more...

Before you head to the mall to buy the perfect gift for your spouse consider giving one of the following:

• A Gift of Your Talents
• A Gift of Your Time and Energy
• A Gift of a Promise
• A Gift of Listening

Gifts don't have to be elaborate. Often simple, spontaneous gifts from your heart or gifts of your time are ones that are the most memorable. Additionally, gifts of your time or talents are easier on the budget during these rough financial times.

There's an interesting discussion on our Marriage Forum, "She Snooped", that questions the pros and cons of privacy on cell phones and computers versus total transparency.

How do you handle computer and internet use in your marriage? Do you have a list of rules about your passwords, usernames, email accounts, Facebook, Twitter, etc? Please share your story about how you and your spouse handle this issue.

The Christmas theme for the White House is "Reflect, Rejoice and Renew."

When we first read the press release from the White House, we thought that's a theme that could be good for married couples, too. Look at your schedule this month and save three blocks of time just for the two of you.

• Reflect on your life together. You could start a journal that you use each year for this reflection which you write together or you could write love letters to each other.
• Rejoice in your love for one another. Spend the time doing something you both enjoy doing that you haven't had the time to do lately. Remember to keep this celebration simple.
• Renew your commitment to each other and make plans together for next year. We're not talking New Year's resolutions but making a few goals for next year. It could also be a good time to have your annual financial talk.

It is both with sadness and frustration that we added the marriage of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren to our list of marriage scandals.

Although in his public apology to his family Tiger wrote "Personal sins should not require press releases and problems within a family shouldn't have to mean public confessions ...", the reality is Tiger made his fortune off his super celebrity status and he is or was a role model for many individuals. It definitely is harder for couples to work through their marriage problems in the midst of "tabloid scrutiny" but it can be done.

It is rather ironic that couples like Mayumi and Richard Heene and Tareq and Michaele Salahi will go to great lengths to achieve fame, while Tiger and Elin realize one of the difficult consequences of living their lives in the spotlight.

Extended families (aka in-laws) can gather together and have a good time!

Our Thanksgiving holiday involved staying for three days at a very large house on a small, quiet, rural island with three dogs, four children under the age of five (4 1/2, 2, 1, and 5 months), three young couples, one family friend, and three sets of grandparents that included one pair of exes, members of all political persuasions, vegetarians and meat eaters -- and there was no squabbling, no heated discussions, and no family drama.

We did experience great and timely communication and too much good food. Everyone brought what they liked to drink and a pie. Folks were assigned a meal to be responsible for or foods to bring.

We all talked with each other -- about future dreams and plans, past and future vacations, staying healthy, remodeling, books, movies, kids, memories, cooking, dogs, cats, and shared pictures on laptops. We did not discuss politics or religion.

Television viewing was limited and consisted of old movies, cartoons, and Wii fitness games. Cell phone signal was non-existent. Folks were free to read, walk, work jigsaw puzzles, play with grandkids, talk, nap, go exploring, do some shopping, take a drive around the island, check email -- whatever they wanted.

Thanks Nola for your wonderful planning. And thanks to everyone there for help in making the time together a relaxing and wonderful gathering.

Check out this Advent calendar that can help enhance your relationship while you enjoy the holidays this year. It is a countdown to Christmas with a new link for couples each day. Be sure to check back every day to see what is behind the next date.

We also recommend that you not put off thinking about and shopping for a gift. for your spouse. Also consider celebrating the The 12 Days of Christmas for Lovers this year! It is an inexpensive way to have fun and show your love.