In the midst of the many painful decisions that spouses of Alzheimer patients have to make, coming to terms with knowing that your life-long partner has forgotten you has to be devastating. Realizing that your mate has fallen in love with someone else has to be one of the most heartbreaking experiences in life.
Retired Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Connor and her children are bringing more awareness to the impact of Alzheimer's Disease on marriage by not hiding John O'Connor's new found love at an assisted living facility.
Describing his father as "a teenager in love", Scott O'Connor said that John O'Connor has "struck up a romance with a fellow Alzheimer's patient" and is happy. Scott said, "Mom was thrilled that Dad was relaxed and happy and comfortable living here and wasn't complaining."
The AP report quoted Peter Reed, senior director of programs at the Alzheimer's Association in Chicago, as saying "one of the things that doesn't go away is the need for relationships."
"There is a complicated ethical dimension to this disease that the former justice inevitably experienced. Think of it this way: How enforceable is the lifelong contract of marriage for someone who doesn't remember the marriage? ... Alzheimer's patients have no choice but to gradually let go of the past. For their families it is heartbreaking to watch. But doctors say the kindest thing families can do is to let go of the past.
Source: David Wright, "Supreme Court Justice Knows It Is Best to Let Alzheimer's Patients Forget the Past: Doctors Say Families Must Allow Patients to Have New Lives", ABCNews.go.com
Full Article: "O'Connor's Son Discusses Ailing Father", SFGate.com
Away From Her Movie Reviews: Reviewer: Marcy Dermansky | Reviewer: Ivana Redwine
Related: John and Sandra Day O'Connor Marriage Profile | Alzheimer's Information | Healthy Seniors and Memory Loss | Living With Alzheimer's Before a Window Closes
I highly recommend the excellent movie called “Away From Her” starring Gordon Pinsent and Julie Christie (2006). This movie mirrors Sandra Day O’Connor’s experience with her husband and Alzheimer’s.