Here are questions to ask yourself to determine if you are abusive towards your spouse and children.
- Is your spouse afraid of you?
- Have you ever threatened to kill your spouse?
- Do you believe that your way is the only way?
- Have you ever hit, slapped, pushed, pulled hair, or choked your spouse?
- Are you the jealous type?
- Do you believe you have the right to know what your spouse is doing and where your spouse is all the time?
- Do you think of yourself as in charge?
- Do you enjoy seeing your spouse in pain, crying or hurt?
- Do you believe your spouse deserves to be hit or yelled at or punished?
- Do you believe your spouse 'asked for it'?
- Do you break or destroy your spouse's belongings on purpose?
- Have you ever been arrested for violent behavior?
- Do you think you have an anger problem?
- Are you afraid of asking for help because you might lose everything that is important to you?
- Has your spouse ever tried to leave you?
- If you answered yes to several of these questions, please see a counselor.
- Saying 'I'm sorry' isn't enough. It is important that you take responsibility for your abusive behavior.
- Don't expect your spouse to forgive and forget quickly. It takes time to rebuild trust once it has been broken.
What You Need
- Honest Self Appraisal
- Willingness to Seek Help
- Ability to Let Go of Controlling Your Spouse
- Understanding of Why You Are Abusive