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Before You Buy Sex Advice Books

Most people will agree that one of the keys to a successful marriage is good sex. Yet the stress of everyday life, health concerns, children, and other distractions can make sexual intimacy a low priority. If you think that your sex life needs some recharging, here are some guidelines in choosing a sex advice book.

Don't Just Buy a Book on Sex
If you are upset with the lack of sex in your marriage, don't run out and buy a book and ask your spouse to read it. This could create more problems. As Shirley Maclaine said, "Sex is hardly ever just about sex."

• Talk about it with one another first!
• Listen to what your spouse has to say.
• Express your own feelings and thoughts by using "I" statements.

Know Why You Want A Book about Sex
Some people are looking for information. Others want to be entertained. Some may be wanting some new ideas or inspiration. It is important to know how you expect a book to help your relationship.

• Do you want a book that will improve your communication with your spouse about sex?

• Do you want a book that will help you figure out more about you and your spouse's sexual likes and dislikes?
• Do you want to learn new techniques and tips so you are a better lover?
• Do you want to learn more about sex in general?
• Do you want to know how to handle a specific sexual dysfunction?

What to Look For
Make sure the book meets the expectations you both have.

• If the illustrations are too offensive or explicit to one of you, the book won't be read.

• A book with a good index and bibliography will be easier to read and more informative.
• Stay with established, well known authors with good reputations.
• Seek books with accurate, up-to-date information.
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