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Warning Signs of a Troubled Marriage

Red Flags in a Marriage


Photo: S. Meltzer / Getty Images, PhotoLink
Photo: S. Meltzer / Getty Images, PhotoLink
If you think your marriage is in trouble, it probably is.

Every marriage relationship is unique, but there are common warning signs and red flags that indicate problems in the marriage.

Here are some of the more common warning signs of a troubled marriage.

  • The two of you bicker a great deal.
  • You are withdrawing from one another or use the eye roll a great deal.
  • You don't fight fair.
  • There is a lot of nitpicking going on between the two of you.
  • You no longer have fun together. Your spouse prefers to spend free time away from you on a regular basis.
  • You have nothing nice to say to one another.
  • You don't talk with one another about your problems.
  • You don't respect one another or you nag one another.
  • You can't agree on goals and values.
  • You don't trust one another and feel suspicious.
  • The level of sexual intimacy in your marriage is low.
  • Teasing has become hurtful.
  • Your mate talks or texts on a cell phone that is kept private.
  • You discover that your spouse is contacting old boyfriends or girlfriends via social media.
  • Your spouse tries to isolate you from your family and friends.
  • You discover your spouse is lying about money, is more frugal than usual, or hides money.
  • You are happier when your spouse is away from home for an afternoon, a meeting, or for a business trip.
  • You realize that there is emotional and/or physical abuse in your marriage.
  • One or both of you have considered being unfaithful or has been unfaithful -- in real life or online.
Scott Haltzman: "If you're having difficulties in your marriage, you don't look outside the marriage as a place to solve it, you look within the marriage and turn to your spouse to find ways to get it better."
Source: Gene Valicenti. "NBC 10 Interview: Is Sex Addiction Real?" 2/19/2010.

Don't Wait to Seek Professional Help

To receive the most from marriage counseling, don't wait until your marriage is beyond repair to get professional help.
Silvana D. Raso: "Bottom line: I hope all of you are in happy marriages but let's be honest, no marriage is perfect. Just be smart, work at keeping your marriage alive and exciting but don't put your head in the sand if red flags are waving in the wind."
Source: Silvana D. Raso. "Trouble in Paradise? How To Tell If Divorce Is On the Horizon." HuffingtonPost.com. 1/17/12.

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