Talk With Each Other -- Not At Each Other

Think back to when the two of you were dating one another. Did you have times when you had nothing to say to one another? Probably not.

When a couple reaches the point of not having anything to say to one another, their marriage is in serious trouble. Here are some tips on why conversation in a marriage is so essential, and topics to talk about.

Andre Maurois, a French novelist, and essayist wrote, "A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short."

Most folks don't marry someone they can't talk with. A good conversation is when you are both contributing to the conversation. When you are having a good conversation with your spouse, you are both giving each other your undivided attention.

Conversation Fills Many Needs

• To be connected to another.
• To have your feelings and thoughts heard and respected.
• To learn new things.
• To sort through issues and problems.
• To discuss and explore solutions.
• To reach an understanding of one another.

What to Talk About

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

• Your spouse's hobbies or other interests.
• Plans for a future trip together.
• Memories of your childhoods.
• Movies or television shows.
• Things you would like to experience or places you would like to visit.
• Something you learned during the day or something you did differently or new that day.
• Discuss your thoughts and feelings about the day.
• Share a few things that made you happy during the day or that you are thankful for that day.
• Ask some questions that begin with "if you could", or "Have you ever", or "do you believe."

Although the news, weather, kids, jobs, money, household chores, health issues, in-laws, friends, etc. are all important topics that the two of you really have to talk about, try not to let them be the main focus of your conversations with each other.