Financial problems in marriage such as uncertainty and financial hardship will hurt your marriage if the two of you are not talking with one another or if either of you is hiding your head in the sand.
Practical Tips for Handling Rough Financial Waters and Weathering the Storm
- Don't hide your heads in the sand. Talk about your financial situation. Focus on what you can do about your financial problems and then try to do it.
"23 percent of survey respondents said they won't do anything differently, even if the economy continues to weaken. Hoping for the best isn't a strategy; planning ahead is the best way to protect your family and build a strong financial future."
Source: "MMI Provides Advice for Coping With Financial Hardship", Business Wire, 7/9/2008.
- List your fixed expenses and your flexible expenses. Identify where you can cut back such as subscribing to fewer television stations, looking for a less expensive telephone plan, having fewer meals in restaurants, etc.
- Control your spending. Don't rely on credit cards unless it is an emergency or for health care. If you have savings, try not to dip into your savings unless you both consider the expense absolutely necessary.
"Our relationship dynamics and resentments get played out with money," says Jenn Berman, PhD, a marriage and family therapist. "It's not uncommon to see a person get mad at his or her spouse, and then go out and buy something as revenge."
Source: Heather Hatfield, "Managing Marriage and Money Problems", WebMd.com
- If you are living paycheck to paycheck and are behind in your bills, learn your rights, then talk with your creditors about your financial problems.
- Be realistic. Share your concerns and expectations with each other about your financial problems and the financial decisions the two of you have made. Don't turn your discussions about financial problems into a win-lose situation.
"Trying to prove your spouse wrong is the wrong way to go," says psychologist Jonathan Rich, author of The Couple's Guide to Love and Money. Aim instead to create a plan that works for both of you."
Source: Pat Regnier and Amanda Gengler, "Marriage and Money: Get it Right", Cnn.com, 3/14/2006.
- Don't escape into overeating, smoking, drinking, over spending, not sleeping etc. Remember the importance of taking care of yourselves, both emotionally and physically. That means regular sleep, a healthy diet, exercise, and having some fun and laughter in your lives.
