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Sex Appointment

How to Schedule a Sex Appointment for Busy Marriages


Young couple lying in bed, woman with arm around man's neck, smiling
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If your busy schedules or different body clocks are interfering with your sexual intimacy, make a sex appointment with your spouse.

Tips for Making a Sex Appointment and Scheduling Sex

  • Communicate your feelings and thoughts about your sexual intimacy and different time schedules and/or body clocks.
  • Don't fall into the trap of thinking that scheduling sex makes sex boring.
  • Look at both of your schedules and determine a couple of times per week that would work best.
  • Be realistic about your kids' schedules and other commitments.
  • Don't pick a time that you know one of you will need or want to cancel.
  • Accept there will be some compromise for both of you. You both may lose some sleep now and then.
  • Once you have some times scheduled, stay committed to those times with one another.
  • Try to get away once a month without the kids. These one-night stands are good for your marriage.

Why Setting a Sex Appointment With Your Spouse Works

"Adults, on average, have sex about 61 times per year, or slightly more than once a week, according to University of Chicago's National Opinion Research Center. Marital status and age are key influences in sexual activity.
Source: Christopher J. Gearon, "Sex in Marriage: Better Sex in Marriage", Health.Discovery.com

"When physical problems are not the root cause of a diminished sex life, many remedies exist to rekindle the flame of passion. Much of the fix is grounded in communication and reprioritizing one's life to make time for love and sex, says Jan Sinatra, a Manchester, Conn., psychotherapist and co-author of Heart Sense for Women ... Still others may just need to build time into their schedules to be together and let nature takes its course. Simply setting aside date nights can jump-start one's love life."
Source: Christopher J. Gearon, "Sex in Marriage: Better Sex in Marriage", Health.Discovery.com

"How can these two different people ever come together for sex at the same time? After all, a deficit in physical affection can cause more tension than just the other responsibilities (and stresses) of home life, such as kids and balancing work and play ... This is when you might have to get crafty with scheduling sex."
Source: Michael Breus, Ph.D., Good Night: The Sleep Doctor's 4-Week Program to Better Sleep and Better Health, page 153.

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