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Twin Beds or Separate Rooms for Married Couples

Twin Beds or Separate Rooms are Better Than a Divorce


Photo: Push / Getty Images / Digital Vision
Photo: Push / Getty Images / Digital Vision
Twin beds or separate rooms could save your marriage if your spouse's snoring or tossing and turning is keeping you awake.

"Bedtime troubles send three in 10 couples to separate rooms, according to a poll by the National Sleep Foundation, a nonprofit agency. About a quarter of people with partners and 10 percent of singles said sleep problems left them too tired for sex."
Source: JoNel Aleccia, "Do you think I'm sexy? Apnea aid raises doubts", MSNBC.msn.com, 3/20/08.

Your Bed or Mine?

Although some couples worry that sleeping in twin beds or having separate rooms will hurt their intimacy with one another, many sleep experts believe that sleeping apart when there are sleep problem issues can save a marriage and increase intimacy.

"British sleep researchers say the secret of a happy marriage may be separate beds -- or even separate bedrooms."
Source: "Twin Beds (or bedrooms) May Benefit Marriages", PoliticalGateway.com, 3/23/08.

If you believe in your marriage, trust each other, and communicate well with one another about the issue of lack of sleep in your lives, sleeping apart won't hurt your marital intimacy. Asking the question, "Your room or mine" can increase your sexual delight with your spouse.

Having Your Own Room

"In a survey in February by the National Association of Home Builders, builders and architects predicted that more than 60 percent of custom houses would have dual master bedrooms by 2015, according to Gopal Ahluwalia, staff vice president of research at the builders association. Some builders say more than a quarter of their new projects already do."
Source: Tracie Rozhon, "To Have, Hold and Cherish, Until Bedtime", New York Times, March 11, 2007.

Nocturnal Restlessness

Tossing and turning, temperature preferences, feel of linens, weight of linens, hard or soft mattress, snoring, body clocks, and other nocturnal activities lead to a majority of married partners having considerable sleep loss.

The National Sleep Foundation 2005 Sleep in America poll revealed that 23 percent of couples experiencing sleep problems end up in separate beds anyway.

More from the National Sleep Foundation poll:
  • When one spouse has a sleep problem, three-quarters of their spouses end up with sleep problems, too.

  • If a spouse snores, the other spouse loses an average of 49 minutes of sleep each night.

  • More than one third of people with sleep issues say the issues caused problems in their relationship.

  • One quarter of spouses admitted that their sexual relationship had been affected by sleep issues.

Sleep Deprivation Problems

Additionally, lack of sleep can contribute to a greater risk of heart disease, diabetes, and depression. Additionally, lack of sleep can lead to driving drowsy, less productivity, less sex in your marriage, and being more moody.

Don't ignore sleep problems in your marriage. Ultimately, unresolved, sleep issues will create more problems for the two of you.

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