out of 5
Verbal AbuseJanuary 26, 2009
I was married 22 yrs, and was emotionally distant for the last 3-5. I bought this book at a church garage sale for $1. I knew that my husband said things that were of verbal abuse nature, but not until I read this book did I realize that my whole life with my husband was abusive. I am A.D.D., which means its hard for me to sit and concentrate on any one thing for too long, especially a book or paperwork. But, I read this book from end to end. I'm a strong woman; outgoing; business owner of 24 yrs. This book helped me realize many things. It made me cry, and explained that your grief that you're feeling isn't from what was - but, rather the grieving of loss, for all that was to be - your future years together are gone. I realized it wasn't me. I felt lost, sad, unimportant to anyone. I wanted to run away. This book was a sign to me. It truly saved me, and got me out of there. I started therapy after I left, to understand myself more so not to get involved with another abuser. I'm known as a ""pleaser"", and verbal abusers love us. We take the blame for everything - because we are usually the happy go lucky ones that don't like conflict. So, we talk and talk and talk - hoping things will change. It won't. The other thing this book does is it tells you that by the time your finished reading it, you will recognize verbal abuse in any situation; be it siblings, co-workers, friends, spouses, acquaintances...........in anyone. And - it does. I think this book should be a requirement in all high schools; and given to every young woman out there to read. If I had read this 30 years ago, I know it would have made a difference because I would have known the signs of a unhealthy relationship, and the damage it would bring to the family circle if another generation continues down that path. Its too late for me, but I'm hoping now to get help for my daughters so that they are ""aware and awake"" to the signs.
96 of 98 people found this review helpful.