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Readers Respond: Ways to Tell If Your Spouse is a Liar

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  • How do you know if or when your spouse is lying to you? How can you tell if your spouse lies? What method do you use to learn if your spouse is a liar? Share Your Suggestions

    Ways To Tell If Your Spouse Is a Liar

    My husband has slowly turned into a constant liar, it is ruining our marriage. But he insists I've turned into a b***. I kept quiet for a very long time. You learn more by listening, when you hear a story and its different each time you know its bs. Friends have told on him without even realizing. The biggest thing is my gut reaction, I've heard people laugh at that, but I know for a fact. He sent a text, I was waiting for him, for two hours and soon as I read his text, I knew lie. Kept quiet, within two days he told on himself. The saddest part, I put up with it for years, I didn't accuse him, I didn't want to hurt him???!!! I'm over that eyes wide open moving on. No matter how much you love someone, you can only take so much hurt, I can't live with a man I cannot trust.
    —Guest Guest Ariel

    Constant Liar

    I've been with my husband now for 11yrs and I have been through so much pain .. the lying and cheating, I've caught him on so many dating sites, porn sites, also creating relationships from work with different females. If I had the evidence right in his face he would still deny. I've forgave him so many times because I Love him but he doesn't know how to be truthful, I think he needs help but I don't know how .. i keep blaming myself but it's him hurting me and our children .. how to trust I don't know ...
    —sasha1985

    I'm a Liar

    I have lied multiple time to my wife about Dumb things, over the course of 8 years and when she catches me in the lie. I have acted just like some of the comment you women have said above. But I believe this time is different, She is think about leaving me, and she has full right to. But I have truly looked at myself and realized I didn't take responsibility before. I don't want to repeat this pattern again. So could you give me some advise on how to possible regain her trust? I want to change but, She says she will give me a chance. But is going to put behind her, not to forget it but to forgive me and allow me to rebuild her trust? Would any of you believe me, I see that's is what I have been doing. I know its not going to be easy but I want to change. Editor's Note: It will take time for her to trust you again. This article may help. http://marriage.about.com/cs/trustissues/ht/rebuildtrust.htm
    —Guest JReid

    Heart Breaking

    My husband lies about his business trips, when questioned he loses his cool and when I make accusations he says it's my fault, always my fault. He 'trips himself up' with his lies, it breaks my heart but I've got 5 kids and not enough evidence! The really sad bit is that I love him with all my heart, always have and always will.
    —Guest Annie

    Liar Liar Pants on Fire

    I married the Biggest liar or all time cheats, Drinks and is 100% narcist. Didnt see any of this till 3 years ago married 15. Now everyday I just want to end it all and move on with my life. i hate this man with all his stupid lies. hes had many chances to come clean once and for all and each time he chickens out! At this point the lies make me angrier than the truth!
    —Guest believer of all lies..aka Doormat

    Lying By Omission, Hidden Truths

    I have been married 30 years and like some people, I did'nt expect the "hidden truths" of the lies "by omission" clause. I can literally mindread my husband's little white lies, all wives get to a point where the little "what?" equates to "am I busted? I have found out along the way about all of the bills, tickets, credit cards in your "wife" name, that did'nt get paid because he was pissed at the time, "was'nt his credit, ain't comin' back to haunt me..."things" he says that he had said/or did'nt say to family members that got back to me years later, refusing to "include" me in making financial decisions, "forgetting" to tell me who his financial trustee, (not me), would be if anything happened to him, or even what his burial wishes would be. I once asked to "separate", I said I am not leaving my children, he said "I am not leaving MY HOUSE". Nuff said.....
    —Guest WhoDat?

    Ways to Tell If Your Spouse is a Liar

    After 40 years - everything is a lie. I did not, could not believe it at first and for years. Men, real men, just didn't do that - lie. At least my father did not, though certainly not perfect, he insisted on truth from himself and us. I have been emotionally and spiritually murdered, but he does not comprehend the pain at all - not even slightly. My only advice to any one is - GET OUT QUICKLY. Nothing will change. The pain will not stop. If he lies once, he will lie a million times. The google eyed, what are you talking about - I'm an innocent little boy, only gets worse when they get old. But, change - NEVER.
    —Guest old guest

    She Lies Like It Is the Truth

    When someone is so suspicious of you 9 out of 10 times its because they know what they are capable of. If you are being accused all the time by your spouse she is cheating. When someone gets real defensive its because they feel bad about what they did. The girl I am with now cheats and in her mind it is my fault.Hence the word C... Can't understand normal thinking.
    —Guest dan sullivan

    Questtions

    my gf and i have been having problems recently. guys calling her phone at all hours. her saying she is not sure why but will never answer them when im around. yesterday she goes "shopping" with one of her girlfriends for 7 hours. doesnt answer one of my texts ever when she is out without me. doingn laundry today i find her dirty underwear with substance i know wasnt mine inside. she says it is mine from 24 hours prior. after she slept and took a shower. and put on brand new undies. i have asked everyone i know what to think. please help
    —Guest joe1984

    He's a Beautiful Liar

    I love my hubby but he lies even about the smallest things, yet the truth always comes out. Every time I feel he is lying about something, I stay calm I believe him fully. Then I just keep my eyes open for the truth to come to light. It always does. And when I have evidence I lay it all on the table and prove him wrong before he even denies it. He first gets mad, then acts as a victim, then says he would never do that, and when he feels totally cornered he gives up and admits to his wrong doing. He says he's scared the truth will hurt me. When in reality the lie hurts way more. The truth is if it wasn't for proof I would believe him cause he's a good liar. Kinda scary. - gliz119
    —gliz119

    You Always Know

    I think my partner cheats and is always hiding something your gut tells you phone calls she won't answer won't even check the voicemail if I'm sitting there that's proof for me because she knows who's calling right?
    —Guest Beaten

    Wow These Responses Are Overwhelming

    I want to believe he doesn't lie to me, but when he gets extremely defensive, it really makes me leery. I have dealt with white lies before, how big do they get? I can't relate with some of the other signs because he is very good at it and I just feel left in the dark wanting to believe it's all true. He is just defensive due to accusations.
    —Guest Inthedark

    Shouts

    Mine shouts and threatens to leave the house each time I ask questions. He refuses to answer any question I ask even with glaring evidence.
    —Guest MA

    Do Follow up

    Theres usually a paper trail everywhere in todays world Do your homework... Its there-- just needs to be found..
    —Guest Dave

    Busy Body

    He starts to do too much moving, asking unnecessary questioons and he rubs his head a lot. I want our marriage to be over. I don't have time for sorry or the lies!!!!
    —Guest PINK LOVE

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    Ways to Tell If Your Spouse is a Liar

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