For many couples, spending holidays or other special life-cycle events with in-laws and other extended family members creates hassles and marital stress. That doesn't have to happen.

The most important thing you can do is to be up front with one another and with your in-laws and other family members about your expectations of the holidays. If you really don't want to watch a football game or a holiday movie you've seen a dozen times, say so!

Plan some alternative activities. You probably aren't the only one at the family gathering who would like to do something a bit different! We're taking our Wii Fit Plus and Wii Sports Resorts with us to our family gathering. I've been practicing ...

Recently Heidi Klum legally changed her name. The comment that bothers me is "The bond between Heidi Klum and husband Seal just got a little closer. On Friday, a Los Angeles commissioner approved Klum's legal name change to Heidi Samuel, her husband's surname."

I don't think taking on your spouse's name is a way to being closer to your spouse. Your thoughts?

As the holidays get closer, if you find your spouse is crankier than normal, it could be because you are working too many hours and you are not doing your share in getting things ready for the holidays.

One of the best things you can do is to have a talk with your spouse about the holidays.

• Set up a plan and a schedule.
• Follow through on what you agree to do. Don't break your promise!
• Make time for just the two of you during the holidays.

We also like Diane Fassel's suggestion to "Designate certain times, like Friday nights, when you and your spouse both agree to lock those gadgets [tech type] in a drawer."
Source: Maureen Farrell. "10 Ways to Survive a Workaholic Spouse Maureen Farrell." Forbes.com. 11/19/2009.

Although we were not big fans of the Roseanne show in the 1980s, I watched an episode the other night on late TV. If you want an example of how to destroy your marriage, watch this portion of "Fights and Stuff" -- Season 8, Episode 25 of Roseanne. It is obvious that the fight was not a fair fight.

Dan and Roseanne did everything in that fight that a married couple shouldn't do when angry. Read more...