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Top 10 Marriage Mistakes

Common Mistakes That Can Hurt Your Marriage


We've noticed on the Marriage Forum that there is a pattern to the marital problems and issues that people share. Here's our list of the top ten things that you need to try and avoid in your own marriage.

1. Lack of Respect

Friends sat on wall in summer
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Don't badmouth your spouse to your friends or associates. Spouses need to be thanked. They need to know they are appreciated.

2. Not Listening to Your Spouse

This includes allowing your mind to wander, paying more attention to the computer or television set, ignoring body language, and interrupting. Expecting your spouse to be a mind reader is another big communication mistake.

3. Lack of Sexual Intimacy

This is a death knell for a marriage. Seek medical counsel and therapeutic counseling if necessary. Don't leave your spouse wondering why you aren't interested in sex. It's not fair to either of you.

4. Always Having to Be Right

This includes lecturing your mate, or having to have the last word. Very few people can love a know-it-all forever. Admit when you make a mistake or that you don't have all the answers. And please, please, don't answer every simple question your spouse asks with a long-winded boring dissertation on the topic.That doesn't answer the question.

5. Not Walking the Talk

Actions do speak louder than words. When you say you'll do something, do it. When you say you won't do something, follow through. Keep your promises. 

6. Hurtful Teasing

If your spouse says the teasing is hurtful, considers it a put down, or thinks that it is inappropriate, then stop it. Claiming that your spouse doesn't have a sense of humor or is too sensitive is being inconsiderate and unkind. 

7. Dishonesty

Having lies and secrets in your relationship can create distance and lack of trust between the two of you. Be honest with each other. Honesty is considered a must-have by most married couples. 

8. Being Annoying

This includes continuing to have gross personal hygiene habits, or always being late, or nitpicking everything your spouse does, etc. It is when you know you are annoying and you continue to annoy.

9. Being Selfish or Greedy

This is when you spend money on yourself, but make a big deal if your spouse spends a dime. This is not wanting to open your home to friends and family because you prefer to be alone and don't want the hassle of entertaining. This is hogging the remote, only going to cheap restaurants when you could afford better, or not watching movies your spouse wants to see.

10. Having Temper Tantrums

Every couple needs to be able to handle conflict in a constructive way. Having an angry outburst so that you can win an argument will make you the loser in the end. Learn how to fight fair and to make your marriage relationship the winner of any disagreement the two of you have.

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