When your military spouse has been deployed, staying in touch becomes critical for both of you. However, staying in touch will not always be easily accomplished. Here are tips on keeping the lines of communication open between the two of you when you are separated.
Realities of Communication During Deployment
- Although you may regularly email or write to your military spouse, don't expect to receive regular responses in return. Expecting your spouse to quickly respond to you is unfair. There will be times when it is impossible for your spouse to communicate with you.
- There may be times when you don't want your mate to know that you are having problems at home. Your spouse knows that cars break down, kids have difficulties in school, finances get tight, pets run off, etc. That's life. If you pretend that everything is wonderful or try to hide the truth from your spouse, you will create more worry and tension for your spouse by not being honest.
- Don't rely completely on email, chat, or telephone conversations to stay in touch with one another. Sending pictures, news clippings, kids' drawings, and love notes in the mail says you spent time putting the letter together.
- When sending birthday, anniversary, or holiday cards, remember that it takes around 10-15 working days or longer for the mail to reach your deployed spouse.
More Ways to Communicate With Your Military Spouse
- When you send pictures, think in terms of your day-to-day life. Picture stories such as pictures of where you and the kids walk each day, pictures of a trip to the zoo, photos of your pets, what the car looks like after it has been washed, the yard after a snow storm, etc., are sure to be enjoyed.
- If your spouse has access to a computer, you can use the chat feature to talk with one another in real time. You can also create a Web page to show digital photos or you can use free online photo album sites.
- Send care packages that not only have special treats you know your spouse likes, but that also include love notes and coupons with special meanings from you.
When You Can't Communicate With One Another
- Work on uploading photos so that when you can communicate with each other again, you have lots of photos you can quickly share.
- Even if you don't have an address to send letters or cards to, write them anyway. Make sure they are dated. When the two of you are able to communicate again, you can send them off in small doses.
